Future

Boldness… the future depends on our capacity to be bold, the boldness to tell yourself to choose a different path than the usual, the boldness to go out for a walk in a strange place, the boldness to talk to a stranger, it may seem odd or even silly but this is what shapes our future, because not doing this things could cost us not meeting someone, not having a life defining experience or not even find ourselves.

What leads us to that boldness? Why are we lead to do things differently than the usual?

There are many answers, some say that it was destiny, others will say that was God, others may say it was chance and others will say it’s just free will, but what could be the right one?

Maybe it’s not even worth to ask, because whether we’re right or wrong this boldness will keep exist, and when you find the answer to what leads us to be bold you’ll just ask yourself why…  Why did destiny want me to do this? Why did God make me to do this? Why did the chance get me here? Or simply Why did I want to turn left? Once you find the answer you’ll question it and everything that comes after, and then, instead of questioning only our future, we’ll question the reasons that got us there, the situations that made it got us there and everything related to that

Can we know the reason of everything? I say know, because human beings naturally question everything, so whatever the answers we get, more questions will emerge and more doubts will be created

So, do we have certain about anything of the future? No, because we can’t even be sure of ourselves or even the world we live in.

Need you now

Can’t find you anymore, it’s like you have disappeared from the world….I miss your face, your eyes, you smile. It’s like it was yesterday that you made me so happy, like nothing else in the world mattered but now all I feel is a half empty heart waiting to be filled (with you). Every day, there’s something that reminds me about the past, I’m stuck to it, as hard as I try I can’t move on… Do you feel the same? I have no clue, you’re the one I can’t read, the one I can’t know no more how he feels, the one I won’t have, but although I know all that I still can’t move one and I still care about  you, maybe too much, whenever I  see you suffer, I just want to run to near you and ask you what happened and stay there as long as you needed me and then I wake up to reality and I realize that maybe you just don’t want to see me or talk to me.
I live in this shadow of what we used to be, waiting for the sun to hit it again and then maybe you would notice me again and realize that I’ve been there since always, I thought you knew it but apparently the “appearances” worth more than everything we’ve been through.

Sometimes I think I’m just making all up, that this is me dreaming out loud, and now I’m feeling like a philosopher thinking about the existence of the reality, but not the whole, just ours, or more correctly the one I may have made up and lived in for 4 years.

The one thing I really know, is that I exist, you exist and that we are apart, maybe for too long, probably more than we should, but anyway, I still love you.